5 Things To Do Now that the Election is Over – Even If Your Candidate Didn’t Win

This election has been unlike any in recent memory. The candidates are universally not liked, their interactions have been less than civil and their positions on the issues are as far apart as they could be.

To make matters worse, the election has had a huge effect on every American. Friends are turning against each other, marriages are being strained, work places are full of tension. Anger and distrust is pervasive.

But now the election is over and, no matter who won, life goes on. Things might be different politically but we still have to get up in the morning, get the kids off to school, go to work, eat dinner with the in-laws, have date night and take out the garbage.

How to make the transition? Read my latest: 5 Things To Do Now that the Election is Over – Even If Your Candidate Didn’t Win.

#1 – Check in with yourself.

I don’t know about you but for the past few months I have been obsessed with this election. Every day brought stories more shocking than the day before. It was like seeing a bad car accident…I just couldn’t take my eyes off of it.

And I swear it made me sick, both physically and mentally.

So take a moment now and see how you are feeling. Do you feel like you are living just a little bit on edge? Have you been having feelings of sadness more often than usual? Are you spending more time on the computer following the news than talking with your kids about their day? Do you spend your morning commute yelling at all of the incompetent drivers around you?

If you answered yes to any of these questions then the election has definitely taken it’s toll on you. Awareness of this will enable to you take the steps necessary to move forward after this messy election and be yourself again.

#2 – Step away from your computer.

This is key. No matter who won the election the next few months, and years probably, are going to be messy. Neither candidate is going to heal what ails our country.

And neither can you, at least not by obsessing over every little step and misstep that happens going forward.

So stop screen sucking on CNN or FOX news. If you must be in front of a screen instead watch a new show on TV. Netflix just released The Crown, a period drama about Queen Elizabeth II. Or watch what I do: The Walking Dead. Nothing like a post-apocalyptic fantasy to take your mind off of the current day’s woes.

Even better would be to get away from all of it and do something else. Anything else. Shop, hike, swim, read, joust, laugh, cry, travel, scream. Anything that will help you release the tension of the past few months and generate some dopamine to aid in the healing.

You know what works for you. Now is the time to do it!

#3 – Reconnect with friends and family.

One of the saddest bi-products of this election is how it has come between friends, between families, between co-workers.

Social media has made this world a smaller place and we know that people will post things that they wouldn’t necessarily say in person. As a result, we have hurt and alienated each other. I know of many cases where family members don’t speak, friends are no longer friends on Facebook and politics have been forbidden in the workplace to prevent anarchy.

Now is the time to rise above and start to mend those rifts. The election is over and one candidate has won. The supporters of the victor must try to remain humble and the supporters of the loser must accept the outcome and move on. And we must reach out to each other and remember that we love each other and work together to rebuild our families and friend groups.

If these important pieces of the fabrics of our life, the pieces involving love and connection, are permanently damaged then America will never be able to bring about the change that it so desperately needs.

And remember, we are stronger together.

#4 – Make a difference.

Do you know the saying “Be the change that you want to see in the world?” There is no better time then right now to prove that adage true.

No matter who you supported chances are that you aren’t happy with the status quo. And you were hoping that the person you wanted to be President would make changes happen quickly. But, really, change doesn’t start at the top but at the bottom. Think about Rosa Parks and her refusing to give up her seat on the bus. She sparked a movement that ultimately culminated in the Civil Rights Act of 1964, making discrimination because of race illegal.

So be the change. Choose an issue that is important to you and get involved. I know you wonder how “little you”can make a difference but believe me you can.

I regularly give speeches to people with mental illness, telling them the story of my journey. The nurses say that every time I speak one person who wasn’t willing to accept that they are mentally ill does. And with acceptance comes healing. And with healing comes a life worth living…and that life will touch the lives of many others and make a real difference.

One person at a time.

#5 – Take a vacation from all of it.

We have all run a marathon. We are exhausted and weak from the effort. What our body needs is a break. Some nutrients. Some time to heal.

So take the next few months and just live your life. Go to work, be with your kids, walk your dogs, read a book. Let your body recuperate from what it has gone through.

Americans are very bad at convalescing. When we are sick as soon as the major symptoms are gone we get up and go on with our lives. As a result we often get sick again. Over and over.

So take some time and do whatever you need to do to feed your body and soul. I know for me I am going to spend these last few weeks of fall weather at the park with my dog, soaking in the fresh air while I can. Oh, and watching the Walking Dead.

So there you go, my 5 Things To Do Now that the Election is Over.

Our country is right now in a time of crisis. I think that all of us, no matter what our political affiliation, recognize this. And it’s time to make a change. For that to happen every American must do his or her part.

You know when you are on an airplane and the flight attendants give the safety speech. They always say to put your oxygen mask on first before helping others. Following my tips is your oxygen mask. Take care of yourself, heal from the anger and vitriol of the past few months. Make amends. When you are ready, go forth in the world and make a difference, if even in a very small way.

Together, we can change the world.

Looking for more ideas about getting past the election? Contact me and I will help!

Mitzi Bockmann is a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. Her writing has been published in The Huffington PostPrevention MagazineThe Good Man Projectamong others. She works exclusively with women to help them to be all that they want to be in this crazy world in which we live.

Looking for more ways to finding happiness? Contact me NOW and I can help!

5 Reasons Every Woman Needs to Vote – Even if the Options Are Not So Appealing

The 2016 presidential election is one great big mess. Americans have the choice to vote for one of the two least popular candidates in modern history. Not good.

I have spoken with many women how have said that they just aren’t going to vote. I always respond “But you have to!”

According to exit polls, 53 percent of people who voted in the 2012 election were women. In most states there are more women than men registered to vote and there is a much higher turnout rate for women at the polls.

These numbers mean power. And it’s time for women to wield that power. Here it is, my latest… 

5 Reasons Every Woman Needs to Vote.


#1 – To honor the women who came before.

The battle for a woman’s right to vote started in the early 1800s with Susan B. Anthony and Lucretia Mott, among others, working hard to establish women’s equality with men.

For almost 100 years women fought for that equality, part of which was the right to vote. They were humiliated and discriminated against, the subject of derision and sometimes violence for their efforts. They didn’t give up. Even when they were imprisoned and forced to hunger strike these women fought on.

It wasn’t until 1920 that the 19th Amendment, granting women the right to vote, was passed by the US government. Even so, many states didn’t ratify the amendment for years. Mississippi didn’t do so until 1984, 60 years later and only 32 years ago.

32 years ago women in Mississippi could not vote.

Don’t take the right to vote for granted. It was hard fought for and we women need to exercise our right proudly.

#2 – To honor the women we are now.

There is much being said these days about the persistent lack of equality for women in the world. Women make less money on the dollar than men in the workplace. Women who are ambitious are labeled “bitches.” Women are discriminated against for getting pregnant or for having to take care of children. Women are subjected to emotional and physical abuse at the hands of bosses and husbands.

It is time for this to end. And it will only end if we women take a stand.

In her book, Lean In, Sheryl Sandberg talks about how women are held back but also how we hold ourselves back. She makes the argument that women need to advocate more for themselves, to believe themselves equal to men, to not allow discrimination to hold them back from anything

She says that it is up to us to change our stars. No one else will do it for us.

Voting is one way for us to do this, to “Lean In.”  We have the right to vote. We have the right to have a say in the politics of our nation. We have the right to use our voices, the voices we often only whisper with, to bring about real change.

#3 – Because every vote counts.

I know it doesn’t seem that way. Presidents have been elected in spite of the fact that they didn’t win the popular vote. But your vote matters, particularly in your home state.

Each state has a different number of electoral votes and that number is based on the total of all of it’s representatives in Congress, both in the House of Representatives and in the Senate. A candidate needs 270 of those electoral votes to win the presidency.

In most states for a candidate to win that state, and it’s corresponding electoral votes, he or she must receive the majority of it’s popular vote. This is where your vote counts. Your vote will contribute towards a candidate winning, or losing, a state which will in turn determine the outcome of the presidential campaign.

If you don’t cast your vote your candidate could lose your state and, maybe, ultimately, the presidency.

#4 – Because important women’s issues are now at stake.

Right now, more than ever, there are important women’s issues at stake and the next president could have a huge hand in which direction those women’s issues go.

At issue right now is:
*A woman’s right to access Planned Parenthood
*Paid family leave
*Income equality
*Minimum wage increases
*Debt free education

The outcome of all of these issues will have a huge impact on our lives and the lives of our daughters and granddaughters. We can’t just sit back and think that “everyone else” will take care of this. We need to exercise our right to make a real difference. By voting.

#5 – To set a good example for our children.

I remember in 1976 my mother taking me with her to vote. It was the year that Jimmy Carter was running against Gerald Ford. This was not a campaign that had electrified the nation.

I remember driving to the voting booth and my mother telling me about my great-grandmother (and namesake) who fought for the right to vote and how her lawyer husband fought alongside her (and got her out of jail when she was imprisoned). She impressed upon me the importance of voting out of respect for our grandmothers and those who fought alongside them.

I went into the voting booth with her and watched her cast her vote. And we got “I VOTED” stickers afterwards, which was huge.

Our children increasingly take the right to vote for granted and they are increasingly disillusioned by modern politics. It is important for us to teach them, to demonstrate for them, how important this fundamental American right is.

And how by doing so they can make a real difference in the world.

So there you go…5 Reasons Every Woman Needs to Vote.

Every American has the right to vote and that right shouldn’t be ignored or dismissed or taken for granted. Without it our country would be a different place.

And we women, we have the power to change things. In so many ways. Voting is one of them. So get out and vote this year.

Let’s change the world!

Looking for more ideas about how to change your world? Contact me and let’s make it happen!

Mitzi Bockmann is a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. Her writing has been published in The Huffington PostPrevention MagazineThe Good Man Projectamong others. She works exclusively with women to help them to be all that they want to be in this crazy world in which we live.

Looking for more ways to finding happiness? Contact me NOW and I can help!