I think that most women would say that being in a great relationship is a priority in their life and yet many women struggle with the skills necessary to maintain such a relationship.
#1 – Believing in oneself.
This is the most basic skill that a woman must possess to be in the best relationship. Because if a woman doesn’t have a good relationship with herself she will never be able to have a good relationship with others.
Women who don’t believe in themselves look to others to ‘complete them.’ They aren’t confident in their ability to make their way in the world alone and think that without a mate they will never be able to do so.
This lack of self confidence puts an incredible amount of pressure on a partner, to expect them to carry the one they love. Most people are working hard to carry themselves through life and having to carry another is a burden that is often too much to bear. And the relationship fails.
So work hard to believe in yourself. Have your own life and friends and a job that feeds your soul and your self-confidence. Carry your own weight in the world and you will be a good partner in a relationship.
#2 – Being willing and able to communicate.
Communication is essential in every relationship. Without it a relationship is doomed.
Being able to talk to your partner about everything, both the good and the bad, is a key skill to have in a good relationship. If you aren’t able to tell your partner that you love them or appreciate them then you won’t be able to reach the closeness that you desire.
And if you can’t tell your partner that they have hurt you or that you are angry with them, and instead internalize your emotions, then your relationship will fail.
So work hard at developing good communication skills. Make an effort to verbalize your feelings, both good and bad. Tell your partner that you love them every day. Make sure that if something is amiss you talk about it before it grows into something big and destructive.
You will be glad you did.
#3 – The ability to be alone.
Maybe women struggle with being alone. Alone in their home, alone out in the world, alone.
A key part of being in a good relationship is the ability to be happy alone.
Once again, the need to rely on someone else for your happiness and ease can be very destructive in a relationship. If any time that your partner needs to do something without you you get clingy and needy then you will push your partner away.
Make an effort to learn how to be alone. Develop hobbies that you can do when your partner is away. Make plans with friends. Don’t rely on your partner to keep you feeling happy and secure.
Because if you don’t do so you will find yourself alone, permanently.
#4 – Being willing to talk about sex.
For whatever reason many women struggle with being able to talk about sex. And sex is a very important part of a good relationship.
What do I mean by the ability to talk about sex? I mean the ability to communicate with your partner how you feel about the sexual part of your relationship. If you are struggling with some aspect of it or particularly enjoy another.
Sex issues can wreak havoc in a good relationship and if partners aren’t honest about how they are feeling the issues will snowball.
On the other hand, the ability to talk about the good parts of your sex life can only make it better. Being able to tell your partner what you like not only enhances your pleasure but talking about it outside of bed is really, really fun!
So make an effort to share your feelings about sex with your partner. And I can guarantee you if you tell your partner what you like about what he is doing he will happy to accommodate you whenever you want him to.
#5 – Being honest.
No relationship of any kind can survive without honesty.
Why? Because honesty is the basis of trust and without trust a relationship simply can’t succeed.
It is essential that you are honest with your partner about everything, from the small and inconsequential to the very important, scary stuff.
If you don’t like the way he slurps his coffee to the point that you don’t want to drink coffee with him, tell him. If you don’t like that you have to spend every Sunday morning with his parents, tell him.
Because if you are honest with your partner you can work together to resolve an issue. If you don’t tell the truth then the issue will be left to fester and the relationship will founder.
So tell the truth. Let your partner know that they can rely on you to be honest with them about issues in your relationships. And if you do they will respond in kind.
And you will live happily every after!
Being in a good relationship is a wonderful thing and something that is attainable for every women.
Work every day to develop and perfect the skills necessary to keep your relationship healthy and strong.
Believe in yourself, talk about how you are feelings, be okay with being alone, talk about sex and always be honest. These skills will get your far in your relationship, and in your life.
And how great will that be?
Mitzi Bockmann is a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. Her writing has been published in The Huffington Post, Prevention Magazine, The Good Man Project, among others. She works exclusively with women to help them to be all that they want to be in this crazy world in which we live.
Looking for more skills to keep your relationship healthy? Contact me NOW and I can help!