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5 Life-Changing Ways that Life Coaching is Different from Therapy

You have been considering life coaching because you have heard that it can change your life. You have might have been in therapy for years and, while it has helped you very much, you know that you are still stuck in many ways.

So now you are considering life coaching and you want to know more.

Let me help!

5 Life-Changing Ways that Life Coaching is Different from Therapy

#1 – If therapy is like archeology, life coaching is like architecture.

A wise person once told me that therapy is like archeology. You dig deep into your history and try to sort through what you find to figure yourself out.

In life coaching one takes what one already has, the stuff learned from therapy and the realities that are your life today, and builds on that. You learn how to live fully with all that you carry with you, to shed what you can and to move forward confidently.

While therapy and life coaching both have their benefits, with life coaching you can be sure that you will be doing more than just talking. You will be defining and taking radical, exciting and fun steps to change your life, and your future, right away.

#2 – In life coaching you will learn to identify EXACTLY what it is you want.

The thing about life is that we know when something is missing. When we aren’t happy or fulfilled. The key to change is identifying what exactly is that missing thing.

One of my clients knew that she just wasn’t happy in her marriage. Her husband worked hard, they didn’t argue, was a good father etc. She just wasn’t satisfied. We talked it through and she realized that what was missing was the thing that she needed most to feel loved – communication. Simply talking. About life and stuff and issues. Just talking.

Once we identified what she needed we could make a plan for how to get it.

#3 – In life coaching we will create a step-by-step plan to get what you want.

Once we identified that my client needed more communication in her life we addressed how she could get it.

It wasn’t so simple for my client to just ask for it. She wanted her husband to be the one that initiated it. We talked about whether he had the capacity to do that. To initiate. Some people just don’t. After some thought she realized that he probably didn’t and that she was going to have to make the first move.

She decided, after some conversation with me, that she would ask that they could schedule in some time every day to talk and to put it on the calendar. If it was on the calendar he would initiate, that she knew.

So that’s what she did. And their marriage improved. Sometimes it’s just as easy as that.

#4 – In life coaching you will be held accountable.

Accountability is an essential part of successful life coaching.

When my client sets a goal I am there on the sidelines to make sure it happens. And how do I do that? Pestering and holding her accountable.

I had a client who decided she needed to walk 3 days a week. I knew that if she walked three days a week for 6 weeks she would be able to make it a habit and therefore stick to it. She knew that in the past she had dropped her goal within a week or so and she didn’t want to do that again.

So, for 6 weeks, I would text my client every Monday, Wednesday and Friday to see if she had walked. If she didn’t she would have to confess to it. And she didn’t want to have to do that.

It’s been 6 months and my client is up to 4 days a week and she is feeling great. She says that having my encouragement, and pestering, made all the difference.

#5 – In life coaching you will feel and see tangible results quickly.

Speedy results! This is the wonderful thing about life coaching. You don’t have to wait months and months to see change. Change happens as quickly as you want to make it happen. It relies almost exclusively on you and the work that you are willing to do.

When you identify issues and create goals to get you there you can make things happen. And life coaching is the vehicle that enables you to do that! And fast!

So there you go. 5 Life-Changing Ways that Life Coaching is Different from Therapy.

Life coaching truly is life changing. And that life change can be yours right now if you reach out to a life coach (like me!) who can help you identify exactly what you want, help you create a path to get there and hold you accountable for making it happen.

Imagine what it would feel like to finally change that thing in your life that is holding you back.

You can do it!

Mitzi Bockmann is a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. Her writing has been published in The Huffington PostPrevention MagazineThe Good Man Projectamong others. She works exclusively with women to help them to be all that they want to be in this crazy world in which we live.

Looking for more ways to finding happiness? Contact me NOW and I can help!

5 Little Ways for Women to Feel Healthier, Even if Life Always Seems to Get in the Way

Every day moms take care of everyone else. That is just what we do. We make sure the kids are loved, fed, bathed and supported. Likewise our partners. We do our best to carry our share, or more, at work and always try to be a shoulder to cry on for our friends.

What we aren’t good at is taking care of ourselves. We set goals to go to the gym, or sleep more or eat better but in the end life gets in the way and we just let it go.

We don’t have to do this!

Here are 5 Little Ways for Women to Feel Healthier…

#1 – Every day do one thing that makes you happy. It doesn’t need to be a big thing but do something. Make a playlist for your car and listen to music that makes you sing out loud. Serve breakfast for dinner (because no one ever complains when dinner involves pancakes). Bring your book in the car and read a chapter while waiting to pick up the kids at school. Whatever small thing it is that makes your heart sing.

For me, when my kids were little, every Sunday was pizza night and then my People magazine and I would retire to the bathtub for an hour. I went to bed Sunday night happy and Monday mornings were much easier.

#2 – Replace the Oreos. I am willing to bet that before you had kids Oreos were not a staple of your diet. Am I wrong? But now they are because they are in the cupboard. You get tired, or stressed or bored, and there, right in front of you, is a little disk of self-indulgence. So you eat one, or 20, and you feel better for 30 seconds and then you feel not so good.

Keep something that you really love in the cupboard that will fill that need, when you get tired or stressed or bored, and go for that instead. Chocolate covered almonds or honey roasted peanuts or individually wrapped chocolates (so you can’t take a handful). And, if you have something that combines sugar and protein (like sweetened nuts) you won’t be affected by the sugar so quickly and you won’t get that Oreo cookie crash.

#3 – Play with your kids. We all have grand plans when our kids are born, to get down on the floor with them and play. And we do, at least until their sibling is born, and then we as often as not let them have at it.

Playing with your kids is proven to make you happier and happiness leads to healthiness. First of all, play makes you smile and the physical act of smiling actually makes you happy.  Also, by sheer definition, play is fun, more fun than work. So put on a tiara and frolic with your kids, at least for a bit. Try it!

One of my clients plays a game of cards with her kids and her husband every night after dinner. It only takes 20 minutes and they laugh and kid and enjoy each others company. And then off they go to homework etc. She reports that the 20 minutes makes the transitions easier and sets up a much smoother bedtime routine, every mother’s dream.

#4 – Get just a little more sleep. I know you are saying, “Yeah. Right.” But I am serious. Try to fit just a little more sleep into your day. Actually I am suggesting you build it into your schedule. Right there between going to the dry cleaners and finishing your project for the meeting. Make a plan to take a 15-minute nap right after lunch, before you head out to do errands. Or sleep 15 minutes later 3 times a week. Wherever you can fit in just a little more sleep.

If you sleep in 15 minutes 3 days a week that’s 45 minutes more sleep. Add two naps in there and you have more than an hour. Every bit of sleep makes a difference.

#5 – Do one thing that will get your heart rate up. Can’t make time for the gym? No problem. Even a little cardio is better than none. Why? Because getting your heart rate up produces more endorphins and endorphins actually produce a euphoric feeling.

Ideas? Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Dance around the kitchen while cooking a meal. Walk the dog. Ride a bike. Kick a soccer ball. Jump on the trampoline. Getting your heart rate up regularly is a very healthy thing to do.

I have a client whose family got a dog. My client was worried because she knew it would make more work for her, which it did. Of course it needed to be walked but taking it for walks actually changed her life. Not only did getting out of the house and getting her heartbeat up make her feel good, she also made more friends when she was out with the dog, and we know what more friends can do for your health!

So there you go: 5 Little Ways for Moms to Feel Happier. Give them a try for week. See what a difference it makes. Let me know when it does!

Have I missed anything? Do you have something you do that makes you feel healthier in your daily life?

Are you having trouble implementing healthy habits into your life? Do you feel guilty when you try to set aside time to make yourself feel healthier? Let’s talk.

Mitzi Bockmann is a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. Her writing has been published in The Huffington PostPrevention MagazineThe Good Man Projectamong others. She works exclusively with women to help them to be all that they want to be in this crazy world in which we live.

Looking for more ways to finding happiness? Contact me NOW and I can help!

The 5 Best Things You Can Do for a Friend, Even if You Feel Like You Have Nothing Left to Give

One of the most important pieces of true happiness is intimate connection, good friendships. The care and keeping of a friendship is not always the easiest thing to do, especially with the chaotic life that comes with being a mom, but with a little consciousness and action it can be made easier.

Below you will find a list of the 5 best things you can do for a friend. Do them and not only will you be a good friend but you will find yourself a happier person too.

5 Best Things You Can Do For a Friend

#1 – Support each other and be honest

Friends are great for confiding in. There is nothing better than sitting down with a friend and, over a hot cup of tea, debriefing her about the terrible row you had with your partner the night before. A good friend will listen and commiserate. A good friend will also be honest with you, giving her perspective without judging or berating. And a good friend will take note of what her friend says.

#2 – Make each other laugh

This chaotic, jam-packed and exhausting world that we live in can be a poisonous one. The best antidote is laughter. The physical act of smiling will actually improve your mood and if the smile is followed by laughter the effect is exponentially greater.

#3 – Share experiences

Women’s experiences are markedly similar. It’s almost eerie how alike women’s lives are all over the world.  Being around people with shared experience has twofold benefits. First, it makes you fell less alone because you know other people have experienced what you have experienced. Secondly, you can learn from another’s experience by hearing it’s process and outcome.

#4 – Eat ice cream

Many women feel guilty indulging in any kind of sweet. And standing alone at your kitchen counter shoveling Oreos into your mouth is not a good idea. But the act of sharing something sweet with a friend, one bowl, two spoons, can be a truly bonding and uplifting experience.

#5 – Take walks

Exercise is one of the most important things to do to feel healthy and happy. And walking with a friend is a great, painless way to get exercise. As an added benefit, when you go for a walk you can apply the first 3 principles above and then after the walk you can do the 4th without guilt!

So there you go, the 5 best things you can do for a friend. They aren’t difficult at all; they just take a little bit of time and attention. And the benefits are twofold because you both will be happier because of your efforts. And your happiness will pay itself forward to your children, your partner and your co-workers.

What do you do with your friends that make you happy?

 

If you’re feeling like your friendships are suffering, or you’d like to refocus your energy to create healthier, more joyful relationships, let’s talk. Sign up for your free session with me today.

Mitzi Bockmann is a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. Her writing has been published in The Huffington PostPrevention MagazineThe Good Man Projectamong others. She works exclusively with women to help them to be all that they want to be in this crazy world in which we live.

Looking for more ways to finding happiness? Contact me NOW and I can help!