Are you wondering if the guy you love loves you back?
How any times have you sat with a friend as she cried about the man that she loves because she is confused about whether he loves her or not. How many? Thousands perhaps? Me too.
And don’t you always want to say ‘it’s so obvious! He doesn’t love you!’? Because it is so obvious. To you, but not to her.
And now do you find yourself in the her place? Wondering if the guy you love loves you back?
Let me help. There are 5 ways to tell that your guy doesn’t love you. They are:
#1 – He constantly makes excuses about why he can’t spend time with you.
A guy who is in love with a girl actively wants to spend time with her. In fact, he will move heaven and earth to spend time with her.
Now, I am not saying that your guy doesn’t love you if he goes to a football game with the guys or has breakfast with his mother. But if your guy regularly has to work late on date night or is having problems with his car or suddenly has been struck down a mysterious illness then there is the possibility that he is making excuses not to see you.
And if he is making excuses to not see you then he definitely isn’t in love with you. Because, if he was, he would be sitting right by your side and you would not be reading this article
#2 – He ghosts you in any way.
Does your guy disappear?
Do you text him and not hear back for hours and when you do there is talk about a broken phone keyboard or a dead battery?
Are you supposed to meet your guy for dinner but at the last minute he tells you he can’t make it and then you don’t hear from him for a day?
Does he tell you that he isn’t feeling well enough to hang out with you and then spends the night posting on Facebook and he doesn’t respond to any of your messages?
If your guy ghosts you in any way he doesn’t love you. A guy who loves a girl treats her with respect and that respect means that he responds to her clearly and honestly. He is clear about his actions and his intentions and he shares them with her.
So, if your guy disappears regularly, with lame excuses, then he most definitely isn’t in love with you.
#3 – He spends more time on his hobbies than with you.
Does your man have a hobby that regularly takes him away from you?
A client of mine has a guy who is passionate about riding his bike. Every weekend he goes out with this posse and they clock as many miles as they can get in. Every weekend.
My friend had no problem with his passion for biking until he started to put his bike over her on his priority list. The weekend would come along and she would want to just spend time with him but his bike ride came first. So, she would wait and when he got back he was always too tired to do anything with her.
If you man has a hobby great! Everyone should have a hobby! But if he regularly puts his hobby ahead of you on his play list then he doesn’t love you.
Time to go find a man who has a hobby to share with the woman he loves.
#4 – He isn’t always nice to you.
Do you come downstairs after carefully dressing for dinner only to have your guy make a snide comment about what you are wearing?
Does your man comment on your horrible cooking in front of your friends?
Does he mock new ideas that you might have about your career?
If your man does any of these things, he doesn’t love you. A man who is in love with a woman treats her with the utmost respect and would never dream of being unkind to her.
Of course, some men are clueless and will say something innocent about your dress without meaning to but if your man is regularly unkind to you then he definitely doesn’t love you.
#5 – He doesn’t do things just to make you happy.
Do you make plans to go out with the girls and ask him to take care of the kids and he refuses?
Do you want to spend that extra money that you have saved on a new dishwasher and he insists that it would be better spent elsewhere?
Do you want to spend some quality time with him but he is always too busy?
Men who love their woman want to give them what they want because they know that if a woman feels taken care of she will feel loved. If a man is always selfish in his considerations and doesn’t care at all what you want then that man doesn’t love you.
So, I ask you, if your friend was telling you about a man who fits the criteria above, what you would you say to her? And what would you hope your friend would say to you if the positions were reversed?
Read this list. Keep it. Memorize it. Use it now to get rid of the guy who doesn’t love you and keep it for later use. Hopefully you won’t need it but keep it close in case you do…
The guy who will truly love you is out there. Don’t settle for someone who just pretends he does. Move on NOW!
Are you wondering if your guy loves you back?
Let me help!
Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and let’s get started!
I am a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. My writing has been published on The Huffington Post, Prevention, Psych Central, Pop Sugar, MSN and The Good Man Project, among others. I work with all kinds of people to help them go from depressed and overwhelmed to confident and happy in their relationships and in their world.