Remember when you were little, and you had big dreams for when you were finally a grown-up?
I wanted to be an astronaut. Or a ballerina. Unfortunately, my hopes of being either of those things fell by the wayside when I failed earth science and grew a foot.
After college, I thought maybe I wanted to write and help people, but my goals were vague, so instead, I went into the hospitality business and then into retail sales and then became a mom. Before I knew it, I was 40 and a working mom, and my dreams had disappeared under a load of laundry.
Now, 12 years later, I am living the life of my dreams. I write articles and blogs and coach women toward reaching their dreams. I have learned a lot along the way, and I want to share it with you today.
#1 – Be clear about what is important to you.
I can ‘ t say this enough. If you don ‘ t know what is important to you, then you can ‘ t make it a priority. Instead, your life will consist of day after day just doing the things that you need to do to get by.
Do this. Mark out 1 hour on your calendar this week, one hour to sit down with a cup of tea, and write down everything that you can think of that is important to you. Write down the things that you do and things that you don ‘ t. Set your list aside and go take a walk.
A few days later, revisit your list. Did you forget anything? Is there anything on there that maybe shouldn ‘ t be?
Next, circle the top 10 most important things on your list. From that list, circle the top 7 most important things, and then from that list circle the top 5 most important things. From your top 5 list, circle the top 3 most important things.
You now have the top 3 things that are most important to you. See, that wasn ‘ t so hard.
From there, you choose the #1 thing that is most important to you, and now you have a starting point.
#2 – Create a plan to make that #1 thing happen and make it a priority.
This is an important thing to do. Many of us get overwhelmed at the prospect of actually reaching our goal. If it’s to run 10 miles, three miles per week, and we are running nothing now, then making the jump from 0-10 miles seems undoable. So we don’t, and we give up.
Instead, we need to recognize that to reach our goal we have to take it one step at a time. And one step at a time is easy.
The first step is about getting moving. Schedule three days a week to get outside and walk. Just for 15 minutes. Something to get your body used to the movement.
Put it on your calendar. In RED ink so that you can’t ignore it.
After the first week, increase your time to 20 minutes three times per week.
After the second week, you could walk for 10 minutes and run for 10 minutes three times per week.
After the third week, you can run for the full 20 minutes three times a week.
Gradually you can increase your time and distance until you reach your goal of 10 miles three times a week.
One step at a time.
#3 – Surround yourself with a supportive and loving community.
Your community can be made up of family, friends, co-workers, and gym mates who can support you and hold you accountable. This is key to success. We all have good intentions, but without support and accountability, it ‘ s hard to stay on the path to reaching our dreams.
What is the best kind of support you can get? A life coach who will encourage you and hold you accountable. Just sayin’.
#4 – Do NOT doubt yourself.
This is the most self-sabotaging thing that we do. We listen to the voice in our head that tells us that we can ‘ t do something. That we don ‘ t have the time or that we aren ‘ t good enough, or that we don ‘ t deserve something.
This is, may I say, complete bullshit. You are an amazing person, someone who gives and gives and you should have the life of your dreams. And if you are happy, everyone around you will be happy!
Believe that you are capable of reaching your goals. One step at a time. I believe in you.
#5 – Take care of yourself and try to have a little fun.
Yes, our lives are crazy, but it is essential that every woman take a little time for herself. Take a bath, go for a walk, go shopping with a friend, climb a mountain, learn to surf, or take a road trip. Do something every day that feeds your soul. Take at least 1 day a month to do something that will make you happy.
And at least once a year get away, alone, to get to know yourself again.
Remember, it ‘ s never too late to live the life that you want. You just need to decide what that life is and then take that first step. The rest you can do, easy.
Just look at all that you do now. Only Superwoman can do what you do every day. Your dreams will be a cinch ‘ ¦
If you have read this far you must reallywantto reach your dreams.
Let me help you, NOW, before they get away!
Email me at [email protected] and let’s get started!
I am a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. My writing has been published on The Huffington Post, Prevention, Psych Central, Pop Sugar, MSN and The Good Man Project, among others. I work with all kinds of people to help them go from depressed and overwhelmed to confident and happy in their relationships and in their world.
