Best Books for Healing After Heartbreak

Heartbreak can feel overwhelming, impacting both your emotions and daily life. But the right book can provide tools to help you recover, rebuild, and grow. Here’s a list of ten highly recommended books that tackle heartbreak from different angles – whether you need practical advice, emotional support, or a new perspective on healing:

• It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken by Greg Behrendt & Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt: Straightforward advice to accept the breakup and move forward with humor and clarity.
• This Is Me Letting You Go by Heidi Priebe: Self-reflection exercises to rediscover yourself and build healthier patterns.
• Getting Past Your Breakup by Susan J. Elliott: Actionable steps like the “no contact” rule to help you heal and regain control.
• The Wisdom of a Broken Heart by Susan Piver: Encourages embracing emotions as a path to personal growth.
• Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert: A memoir of self-discovery and healing after divorce.
• The Journey from Abandonment to Healing by Susan Anderson: Explores the emotional stages of heartbreak and tools for recovery.
• The Happiness Trap by Russ Harris: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) techniques to manage emotions and find peace.
• Feeling Good by David D. Burns: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) strategies to overcome negative thought patterns.
• Rising Strong by Brené Brown: A guide to resilience, identifying emotional triggers, and rewriting your story.
• Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl: A philosophical approach to finding purpose and strength through pain.

Each book caters to different needs, from practical steps to deep emotional insights. Whether you’re looking to process your feelings, shift your perspective, or take actionable steps, there’s a book here for you.

Quick Comparison

Choose a book that fits your current stage of healing and start your journey toward recovery.

Book Recommendations – 4 Books to Mend a Broken Heart

#1 – It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken by Greg Behrendt & Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt

This book gets straight to the point: your relationship ended for a reason, and that’s actually a good thing. Written by Greg Behrendt, co-author of He’s Just Not That Into You, and his wife Amiira, this guide offers no-nonsense advice, from both male and female viewpoints, to help you cut through the emotional fog that often follows a breakup.

At the most basic level, the authors delivers a clear message: accept the breakup and move forward. They encourage readers to stop dissecting every moment or clinging to false hope, and instead embrace reality and focus on healing. This approach provides a solid foundation for practical, actionable steps toward recovery.

The book likens getting over a breakup to overcoming an addiction, emphasizing the importance of going through "withdrawal" to truly heal. Its blunt, often humorous tone makes it ideal for those who are ready to take action – even if their emotions are still catching up.

#2 – This Is Me Letting You Go by Heidi Priebe

Heidi Priebe’s This Is Me Letting You Go offers a thoughtful approach to navigating the aftermath of a breakup, one that is in complete contrast to It’s Called a Breakup. Instead of simply urging you to "move on," the book encourages deep self-reflection, using the end of a relationship as a chance to rediscover yourself and build self-love. Packed with exercises and reflection prompts, the book helps you identify relationship patterns, attachment styles, and codependency, and, thereby, uncover the roots of your emotional experiences.

These insights not only support personal growth but also lay the groundwork for creating healthier, more fulfilling relationships in the future.

#3 – Getting Past Your Breakup by Susan J. Elliott.

Susan J. Elliott’s Getting Past Your Breakup offers a straightforward and actionable guide for navigating the aftermath of a relationship. It’s not just about getting over someone – it’s about truly healing and building a stronger version of yourself.

At the heart of the book is something that is very near and dear to my heart, and the key to getting through a break up: the "no contact" rule. Cutting off communication with your ex might feel extreme or even painful at first, but it’s a necessary step to allow your emotions to settle and begin the healing process. Staying in touch can keep old wounds open, making it harder to move forward.

Elliott is not afraid to call out behaviors that might be holding you back – whether it’s clinging to unrealistic expectations or falling into self-destructive cycles. She delivers her message with a balance of empathy and honesty helps readers face hard truths while feeling supported.

"Part of moving on is about learning to love yourself, possibly for the first time. If you learn to truly enjoy your own company, you will be far less likely to choose bad relationships just for the sake of being in one." – Susan J. Elliott ^[2]

#4 – The Wisdom of a Broken Heart by Susan Piver

Susan Piver’s The Wisdom of a Broken Heart takes a totally different approach to navigating heartbreak – instead of urging readers to "move on" or distract themselves, Piver encourages embracing the pain as an opportunity for personal growth and self-discovery.

What sets this book apart is its focus on leaning into the discomfort rather than avoiding it. Piver understands that the end of a relationship can bring overwhelming emotional devastation. Rather than offering quick fixes or distractions, she suggests sitting with the pain and allowing it to fuel meaningful transformation. By sharing her own experiences with heartbreak she inspires her reader to take action.

#5 – Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

When this book was first published, and was an international sensation, I refused to read it – because everyone else was doing it. And then, because I was desperate, I read it and it changed the trajectory of my life.

Eat, Pray, Love captures the author’s deeply personal journey of rediscovery and healing following a painful divorce.

The book chronicles a transformative year in Gilbert’s life as she travels to three countries: Italy, where she indulges in the simple joys of food and pleasure; India ,where she dives into spirituality and self-reflection; and Indonesia, where she seeks balance and connection, and finds love.

By telling her story, Gilbert shows how rebuilding a relationship with yourself often requires stepping into the unknown and embracing discomfort. She also clearly demonstrates that stepping outside of one’s comfort zones can inspire personal growth and healing.

#6 – The Journey from Abandonment to Healing by Susan Anderson

Susan Anderson’s The Journey from Abandonment to Healing takes a deep and empathetic dive into the emotional wreckage of heartbreak. As a psychotherapist with expertise in abandonment recovery, Anderson argues that all breakups through five stages: shattering, withdrawal, internalizing, rage, and lifting.

Anderson explains the science behind why heartbreak can feel like a physical wound and why the aftermath might resemble withdrawal symptoms. Recognizing that these intense reactions have a biochemical basis can bring a sense of relief during those overwhelming moments.

She also encourages her readers to break free from what she calls "protest mode" – that exhausting cycle of resisting reality, clinging to what’s lost, and being consumed by anger and longing – and to embrace acceptance by acknowledging their emotions and taking steps to move forward.

The book includes practical exercises aimed at managing pain and cultivating self-compassion, offering readers actionable tools to navigate their healing journey.

One reader, Toni Kohn, shared how the book profoundly impacted her during a difficult time:

"As an abandonment survivor, I recommend Susan’s work to those in the thick of despair. In the days I was at my worst, I remember reading The Journey from Abandonment to Healing, and it was the first time I felt understood, less alone, and with a road map out of the depths of despair. I am forever grateful and continue to follow her work."

• Toni Kohn ^[3]

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# 7 – The Happiness Trap by Russ Harris

Russ Harris’s The Happiness Trap, using principles from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), helps one work through tough emotions instead of fighting against them and offers practical tools to help manage emotional challenges effectively ^[7].

Harris argues that trying to suppress or escape negative feelings often makes things worse. After a breakup, it’s normal to feel sadness, anger, or anxiety – but the real issue arises when you resist these emotions or expect them to disappear instantly.

Russ suggest 5 key strategies to handle these emotions:

• Defusion: This involves stepping back from negative thoughts. For example, instead of believing "I’m not good enough,” try reframing it as "I’m having the thought that I’m not good enough." This subtle shift can reduce the emotional weight of the thought ^[6]
• Acceptance: Rather than pushing away uncomfortable feelings, feel them. Acknowledge that pain is part of being human, and much of our suffering comes from resisting what we feel ^[6]
• Mindfulness: Staying present can stop the cycle of obsessing over the past or worrying about the future. ^[6]
• Clarifying Your Values: Think about what truly matters to you beyond your relationship. Questions like "What kind of person do I want to be?" or "What do I stand for?" can help you identify your core values. ^[6]
• Committed Action: Even if you’re feeling unmotivated, taking small, values-driven steps can create momentum. These actions, no matter how minor, help you align your life with what matters most ^[6].

While Harris’s method can not erase the pain of heartbreak, he offers tools to help you carry it more lightly. By embracing these techniques, you can turn emotional struggles into opportunities to build a life centered on your values and personal growth.

#8 – Feeling Good by David D. Burns

In Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy, David D. Burns outlines how Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can serve to dismantle negative thinking, something that, after a break up, can amplify emotional pain and make it harder to move forward.

One standout chapter, "Love Addiction," explores how distorted beliefs about rejection can trap you in cycles of hopelessness. By identifying these patterns, you can begin to see how your perspective on rejection might be holding you back from healing.

Although Feeling Good isn’t specifically about recovering from heartbreak, its CBT-based strategies offer valuable tools for breaking free from negative thought loops can play a key role in finding emotional balance after a breakup.

9. Rising Strong by Brené Brown

Rising Strong dives into the art of recovering from setbacks and building resilience through a straightforward three-step process: reckoning, rumble, and revolution.

In the reckoning phase, Brown encourages readers to identify their emotional triggers and observe their feelings without trying to suppress them. After all, recognizing and understanding your emotions is the first step toward healing.

The rumble phase is all about untangling the self-defeating stories we tell ourselves after a breakup and challenging those limiting beliefs and rewriting the story you tell yourself.

Finally, the revolution phase focuses on using the pain you’ve experienced to build emotional strength and authenticity in future relationships. It’s not about erasing the past or pretending the relationship didn’t matter but instead it’s about taking what you’ve learned and applying it to how you live and love moving forward.

The key to Brown’s perspective is her emphasis on vulnerability, something that reframes it as a source of strength rather than weakness, emphasizing that the willingness to risk being hurt again is essential for forming deep, meaningful connections.

Sometimes finding just the right book can help you get through your breakup and out the other side, even better than you were before.

Each of these titles offer a wealth of wisdom, each providing a unique approach to healing, ensuring there’s something for everyone, no matter where you are in your journey.

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Mitzi Bockmann