5 Way To Remember That You Are Worthy

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Worthiness. We are all born with an innate sense of worth. As babies, we cry for food, demand attention, and insist on doing things OUR WAY. It is this sense of worth that keeps us alive.

As women and mothers, we tend to lose that sense of self-worth. So much of our time is spent tending to the needs of others, calming crying babies, assuaging angry partners, and talking down disappointed clients, that we stop taking care of ourselves. And when we stop attending to our needs, we start losing our sense of self-worth.

This is not ok. Not knowing how worthy we are can lead to patterns of behavior that only reinforce our belief that we are not worthy of being loved, cared for, or living the life of our dreams. We let our children run all over us, our partners take us for granted, and our bosses demean us.

We stop eating well and taking care of ourselves and we stop reaching for what we want.

#1 – Love yourself like you love your kids.

Take a moment and feel in your body how much you love your kids. That ‘ s an easy feeling to get in touch with, isn ‘ t it? You love your kids unconditionally and would lay down your life for them.

Now, imagine how it would feel to love yourself that way. To know that you always have someone with you who can remind you how awesome you are or point out that you can walk into your boss ‘ office and ask for what you need.

It would feel pretty good, right?

So get in touch with your inner mom and keep her with you always.

#2 – Call your mother.

Look back on #1. Think about how you love your kids. Your mother loves you that much too. So call her.

I have a client who has a twice-weekly phone call with her mother. They don ‘ t discuss anything, just what happens in each other ‘ s lives.

This client ‘ s mother is her daughter ‘ s most faithful fan and cheerleader. She always reminds her daughter of what a great job she is doing as a parent and a wife, the most challenging jobs in the world, and what a wonderful daughter she is for keeping in touch so often.

My client says having one person who regularly reminds her of her awesomeness has changed her life. It gives her the confidence in herself that feeds her desire to be all that she can be.

#3 – Think back to your wedding day.

Your wedding day was a big day. It was a day that you and your partner promised to love and care for each other for a very long time. It was a day when your friends and family stood up for the two of you, supporting you as you started your life together.

Take a moment, take a photo if you have to, and remember how you felt that day. The love you and your partner shared and the love that your friends and family gave you unconditionally. And look at how happy you were cutting that cake ‘ ¦

Remembering your wedding day will remind you that you love and are loved by many people. And what better way to touch base with that inner self-worth than through a bit of love?

#4 – Remember earlier successes.

We have all had many, many successes in our lives but for some reason, it is the failures that stick with us. Do you know those failures that keep you up at night, obsessing? Yep, those.

Instead of obsessing, try taking stock of the successes you have had. The ‘ A ‘ you got on your thesis in college, the interview that landed you that first job out of college, that dress you were rocking the day your partner first saw you, the 10lb child you gave birth to in 3 hours, without drugs. Those are all pretty huge successes. Ones you should celebrate.

Try keeping a list in your head, or even better on paper, of the successes you have had in your life, the successes that deep down you are proud of, and look back on them as needed as reminders of just how amazing you are.

#5 – Relish your everyday victories.

This is an important one. Many of us feel like we are failures all day, every day. We don ‘ t pack an organic lunch for our kids and then yell at them when they dawdle and miss the school bus. We are short with our partners when they let us down in some small way. We don ‘ t get enough work done because we are trying to order shoes for the kids from Amazon. All of these we perceive as failures.

But really, we have successes in there too.

First and foremost, we get out of bed every day. Everyone should see that as a success. It ‘ s not as easy as it sounds.

We might not pack organic, but our kids get lunch daily. We might not have finished that spreadsheet, but our kids will have shoes, which is essential, and that spreadsheet will ultimately get finished.

And we get to crawl into bed with our partner at the end of the day and share the closeness that surviving another crazy day brings.

So when those successes happen, recognize and relish them because you do have them. Every day.

To live the life of your dreams, you need to get back in touch with that child who knew her worth and demanded that she get what she needed to survive and thrive.

So try my tips and see what happens.

And I have more tips to share, so get in touch with me NOW, and we can get you on the way to living the life of your dreams.

How To Stop Fighting With Your Husband In 2023 (5 Best Ways)

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Are you wondering how to stop fighting with your husband? Has the frequency and intensity of your fighting grown over time? Do you want to stop fighting so that you can find your way back to each other?

Conflict. We all have it.

We get angry with our mothers, friends, bosses, and kids. It is our husbands, those we have chosen to love and cherish for a lifetime, with whom we seem to get the angriest. And this conflict, this anger, with our husbands can be very destructive and get in the way of living the life of our dreams.

Best Ways To Stop Fighting With Your Husband:

However, there are ways to get through conflict, which is way easier than one would think.

#1 – Carefully choose the time to talk.

This is key.

If you talk to your husband angrily, you will say things you might not mean to say. Words said in the heat of the moment tend to cause much pain and are not necessarily accurate.

Try to wait at least 2 hours after a disturbance before speaking up. This will give you a chance to calm down and speak more clearly. If you can talk calmly about precisely what you are upset about, then you will be more likely to be able to work it out and not let the quarrel escalate.

Also, don ‘ t pick a known stressful time to talk, like during bedtime or just after work. Pick a time when you are calm and can approach the conversation with good energy instead of evil. Calm time can be hard to find, but you can find it when adequately motivated.

#2 – Do not attack.

This is very important and something that many of us do without thinking. And it gets us nowhere.

Let ‘ s say that your husband is always getting home from work late. Instead of saying, ‘ You are always late. Why do you have to be such a jerk? ‘ try saying, ‘ It makes me sad when you are always home late from work. I work hard to get us all together for a family dinner, and I miss it when you aren ‘ t there. ‘

Look carefully at the difference here. If you use the first example, your husband will immediately get on the defensive, and the conversation will end before it begins.

A man and woman playing wii in the kitchen.

In the second example, you are sharing how you FEEL, and no one can argue with how you FEEL. And how you feel is the truth.

What is not the truth is that your husband is a jerk for coming home late.

#3 – Make sure they know you are listening.

This is very hard to do and can feel contrived, but it is crucial to listening and being heard.

It ‘ s called a thoughtful response.

In the case of the example above, with the husband who didn ‘ t come home in time for dinner, the perfect response for him to say would be: ‘ I am sorry that my being late for dinner made you so sad. ‘ With that statement, you know your husband has understood what you are trying to say, which might deflate the argument.

The worst thing you can do is yell back at them, not letting them speak and get their feelings out. Because if you do that, the issue will come up again. Over and over and over.

#4 – Try to remember that we are all only human.

We all make mistakes. More often than not, our troublesome actions are not a reflection of our feelings about someone but are the result of a variety of things (time, motivation, energy level, distractions) that all work together and create a situation that isn ‘ t ideal.

A client of mine’s husband came home on Saturday without picking out the windows he promised her he would pick out. Furious, she said, ‘if you loved me, you would have picked out the windows.’

His mother had called when he was on his way, and he had to run over to help her with something. Yes, it’s not ideal, but it is why he couldn’t do what she had asked, not because he didn’t love him.

Next time you react to something your husband does, take a moment to figure out why it happened. Perhaps you won ‘ t need the two hours to decompress after all.

#5 – Be ready to say sorry and to forgive.

This can be the hardest thing for people ‘ ¦ to say they are sorry and to forgive perceived wrongs… but it is one of the most essential parts of any relationship.

Why don ‘ t we want to say we are sorry? Because it will convey weakness? Because we can ‘ t let go of our anger? Because we are embarrassed by our actions?

Whatever the reason, we need to learn how to do it. Next time you disagree with your husband, try apologizing. See how quickly the anger deflates on both sides.

With the husband who came home late, he should start with, ‘I am sorry that my lateness made you sad. That is apologizing not for the lateness but because of his wife’s pain.

What shouldn’t be said is, “I am sorry that my lateness made you sad, BUT I couldn’t help it.” In an apology, a BUT makes the apology completely ineffective. The BUT means you are making an excuse. You caused pain, no matter the reason, and that needs to be acknowledged.

Similarly, we need to forgive and not hold onto anger. Holding on to anger is one of the most destructive forces in any relationship. If your partner apologizes for his or her actions, you need to find it in your heart to remember that they are only human and that they have taken responsibility for their actions, and that life must move forward.

Final Words:

Arguing with your husband can be a common occurrence in any relationship. Still, it can adversely affect your mental and emotional well-being when it becomes frequent and disruptive. Understanding the causes of your arguments, using effective communication strategies, preventing arguments before they happen, and dealing with ongoing issues are crucial steps to stopping fighting with your husband and maintaining a healthy and happy relationship.

Remember that relationships take work, and moving past arguments and building stronger, healthier relationships is possible. Learning to stop fighting with your husband is vital to keeping your marriage healthy.

Conflict and the resulting anger with anyone can be devastating, especially with a partner. Left unchecked, anger can take on a life of its own and destroy everything in its path.

Don ‘ t let that happen to you. Try to carefully choose your time to talk. Don’t attack. Let them know you are listening and don’t hold on to the anger.

And then, perhaps, you can settle down to a lovely peaceful, conflict-free evening.

Sounds worth it, no?

Do youwant to know more about how to stop fighting with your husband?
Let me help you NOW before it’s too late!
Email me at mitzi@letyourdreamsbegin.com, and let’s get started!

How Life Coaching Can Help You – 5 Reasons To Find A Life Coach

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Everywhere you look, you are bombarded with the message that if you do this ONE THING (take a pill, buy a dress, fix your hair, lease a car), your life will change. And we have all tried that ONE THING, and no miraculous change has occurred.

Shocking! And disappointing.

Working with a life coach is different. The life coach’s approach to change differs from anything you have ever tried, and its potential to create significant change in your life is not to be underestimated.

Ready to be all that you want to be? Truly?

How Life Coaching Can Help You (5 Reasons)

Life coaching is the personal development that can help you achieve your goals and improve your overall quality of life. Unlike therapy or counseling, life coaching focuses on the present and future rather than the past.

A life coach helps you identify your strengths and weaknesses, set achievable goals, and develop a plan to achieve them.

#1. A life coach will help you define what you want and who you want to be.

We know we are dissatisfied with our lives, but most of us don ‘ t know what that looks like. A life coach will help you take stock of your life and define where you are and want to be.

Working with me, we will look at 5 critical areas of your life: physical & mental health, life skills, relationship health, personal care, and career satisfaction.

A good look at these areas will help us determine where you are now and where you want to be, information that is indispensable in bringing about change.

#2 – A life coach will help you create a plan.

Once you have a clear idea of where you are and where you want to be, it ‘ s time to make a plan. You can try to do this on your own, but oftentimes, the prospect seems so overwhelming and off-putting that you don ‘ t know where to start. So you don ‘ t.

A life coach can help you cut through the clutter and the chaos and help you create a plan to get you where you want to be, step by step.

#3 – A life coach will hold you accountable.

This is a vital part of life coaching, one of those things that you really CAN’Tfind anywhere else. Seriously. Anywhere else.

We all have friends and loved ones who support us and promise to make sure we do what we say we will do. But they love us, don ‘ t want to nag, and want us to be happy. And all of that is wonderful, but it doesn ‘ t help you reach your dreams.

Every week your life coach will work with you to create action steps, and every week the two of you will come up with a list of ‘ homework, ‘ things to be done to move you forward on your path.

Your coach will ask about your homework the following week, and I promise you will want to report that you did it. And you will want to do it because you will see how remarkable the change is happening.

#4 – A life coach will power you through the obstacles.

Rocks get onto the road that we are traveling. Sometimes they are small ones that we can pick up and toss aside, but sometimes, they are boulders that require more effort to maneuver around.

A life coach has the knowledge and experience to help you break through those rocks. A life coach can teach you the tools to get past any rock that might get in your way, big or small.

And those tools you can use now and carry in your toolbox forever.

#5 – A life coach will give you unconditional support and encouragement.

Think about a football coach. What does he do? He teaches his team how to play their best and cheers from the sidelines as they do so.

A life coach is the same way. A life coach is there to be your biggest cheerleader but, at the same time, teach you how to be your true self.

And a life coach will be there every step of the way to help you when you falter and cheer you on when you succeed.

Isn ‘ t that just the kind of unconditional support we all want?

Final Words:

Life coaching can be a powerful tool for personal growth and development. It can help you achieve your goals, improve communication skills, overcome limiting beliefs, and increase motivation and accountability. When choosing a life coach, finding someone who is qualified, experienced, and who you feel comfortable working with is essential.

So now you can see how life coaching is that ONE THING that can help you bring about significant, wondrous change.

Working with a life coach will help you finally live the life you have always known you could. And you don ‘ t need to change your hair color or ride to do so.

Of course, every time I mention a life coach above, I mean ME, so get in touch with me NOW, and let ‘ s start making your dreams come true!

7 Things to Teach Your Kids SO They Won’t Drive You Crazy

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I am on the other side of raising my kids. Well, mostly. Does it ever really end? Both of my kids are in college, are polite, kind, exciting and inquisitive, and I couldn ‘ t be prouder of them.

The teenage years were tough, but not as tough as they could have been because of what we taught them when they were young.

Teaching these things works. I watched my friends who didn ‘ t teach them flounder during those difficult years, and many wished they could go back and reinvent the wheel.

You won ‘ t have to do that if you read this list…

7 Things to Teach Your Kids So They Won ‘ t Drive You Crazy

Being a parent is one of the most challenging jobs in the world. Raising kids can be challenging, from sleepless nights to endless tantrums. As much as we love our little ones, there are moments when they can drive us crazy. The good news is that there are things we can teach them now that can prevent this from happening.

Here are seven things you can teach your kids now so they won’t drive you crazy!

#1 – How To listen.

If you will take only one thing away from this blog post, take this. Listen to your kids and teach them how to listen to you.

Kids have a lot to say, much of it ramblings, but a lot of information is coming out, and if you aren ‘ t listening, you will miss it. If you hear what they are saying, you can help, guide and support them with what they need, not what you think they need.

#2 – How To alk.

We adults tend to discount what children say, and we shouldn ‘ t. Let them talk and feel heard; they will come to you when they are teenagers and need to talk.

Talk to your kids in a way that encourages them to listen to you and understand where you are coming from. If they understand and trust you, they are way more likely to respect you when they are older.

#3 – You have set appropriate boundaries and will stick to them.

This is very important. If your kids learn early what their boundaries are and that their parents will enforce them, they are less likely to push back when they are teenagers. Our kids were allowed one hour of screen time before homework. When that hour was up, there was no arguing because they knew that if they argued, there would be no screen time the next day. And we stuck to it. Listening to their parents will be as much second nature as brushing their teeth.

#4 – Good habits.

Again, instilling habits is about creating habits that are second nature. Ensure they eat breakfast, have some time outside daily, and treat the dog with love and respect. When they become self-centered teenagers, the habits that they have learned in their childhood will stay with them.

#5 – Good behavior.

Another important one. We parents need to model good behavior. To this end, we must follow “The Golden Rule”: do unto others as you would have others do unto you. If you are impatient with your kids or yell at your husband, your kids will see and mimic your behaviour. The same with how you talk to people in the store, on the phone, or at Christmas. If your kids see you being polite, respectful and friendly, they will be likelier to act them same way.

#6 – The value of free time.

Everyone needs to learn what it is like to have some down time. Make sure they have time every day for themselves and aren ‘ t caught up in the maelstrom of modern life ‘ ¦excelling at sports, academics and social service. Yes, make that a part of their lives, but also let them be kids. They will be adults soon enough and will have a lifetime of maelstrom.

#7 – The importance of reaching for their dreams.

Kids have dreams that need to be encouraged and supported by their parents, even if those dreams seem out of reach or ridiculous to you. So instead of trying to ‘ set them straight ‘ about how life works, encourage their pie in the sky dreaming.

And let them fail to reach those dreams, if that is part of their journey. Children who only know success or that their parents will fix everything will never learn how to fail, bounce back, and grow. They will believe everything will be handled and not reach out to the world with confidence and bravado.

If you teach these things to your kids, those teenage years will be more accessible. And those teenage years are when Moms finally have time to grow. If you aren ‘ t always focused on and fighting with your kids, then you will have time and energy to reach out for your dreams.

And don ‘ t forget- I can help you with that. Get in touch with me NOW, and we can get your started. You will be glad you did!

7 Easy Steps to Get Rid of Stuff and Breathe Easier

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We all have stuff. It ‘ s just what Americans do. We collect stuff. Some of us have more of it than others, and some have a more challenging time controlling that stuff.

Having too much stuff can cause a ton of stress.

There is an efficient way to get rid of all that stress-inducing stuff, a few secrets of which I will share with you here today.

#1 – Identify what room needs to be de-stuffed first.

This is the key. If you look around the house and think, ‘ I need to get rid of ALL this stuff ‘ , you will get so overwhelmed that you will just go watch an episode of ‘ Orange is the New Black ‘ instead.

Choose one room. Any room. If you want to start small, do so. Like the mudroom or the laundry. Or even a dresser drawer. Completing the task of de-stuffing that room or drawer, will make you feel so good that it will make you want to tackle a larger room next.

#2 – Give yourself time to start and finish the project and prioritise it.

This is key. You need to make a date with that room that you won ‘ t break. If you try to do this ‘ when you have time ‘ well, you know. Most likely, it just won ‘ t happen.

When planning your week, choose an hour or two (or more) and put them on your calendar IN RED so you will see it, remember it and not change it. If it’s on your calendar, you will likely complete it!

Also, Salvation Army (and other charities) will pick up stuff from your house for free. So, call the Salvation Army and set up a pick up date with them. If you have a deadline to work around, you will be more likely to stick to your throw away schedule.

#3 – Turn on Spotify and set up your speakers.

Throwing away is way easier when done to music. Get out your favorite playlist, wear some comfy clothes and get ready to get down to it.

#4 – Start in one corner of the room.

This is a my special secret and one that WORKS!

In the chosen corner of the room, garbage bag in hand, throw things away. Things that you aren ‘ t using that are broken, that are expired. Put them in that garbage bag. Things you are still using, and keeping get placed nicely back where they belong.

If you aren ‘ t sure whether or not something needs to be thrown out, consider when the last time was that you touched that thing or even thought about it. If it was over 3 months ago, it ‘ s gone. Acknowledge and be thankful for its role in your life, and then say goodbye.

If you come across something emotionally fraught, just put it back and get to it later. Don’t let it shut down your learning out process.

Work your way around the room, repeating this process over and over. Don ‘ t skip ahead. Do all four sides of the room. You can do them all in one session or spread them out in more manageable chunks.

#5 – Use the middle of the room.

As you throw away the things that are broken and leave the things that aren ‘ t, you will come across things that can be 1. recycled or 2. given to the Salvation Army. Put those thing in the middle of the room, in two piles. When you are done, you can put the recycled stuff at the curb and wait for the Salvation Army to pick up the rest.

NOTE: if this step is overwhelming, dividing things into two piles, skip it and get a giant garbage bag. Put it all in the garbage, and don’t look back.

#6 – Take a minute and look around.

Stand in the doorway of that room. Appreciate how de-stuffed it is. Notice how it makes you feel. Less stressed? Recognize that YOU DID THIS. All by yourself.

Appreciating your hard work is a great way to be inspired to keep it up. I used to keep my dining room clean so that whenever I walked by it, I was reminded of what I could do.

If you can do this, imagine what else you can do ‘ ¦.

#7 – Do not buy more stuff.

I know this seems obvious, but it ‘ s what we do. We go to Sam ‘ s Club and think, ‘ Oh, look. This croquet set is so cheap, and summer is coming, and we could play together as a family and ‘ ¦. ‘ The reality is that it may get used once and then put away to gather dust.

Consider purchases carefully before making them. You will not only reduce your stress, but you will save yourself money. Money you can use for a massage or something else that will make your life better.

Getting rid of stuff can change your life. De-cluttering your house can de-clutter your mind, freeing it up for way more important things.

Choose what area of your house you would like to start on, set a date, put it to music and throw things away.

Decluttering your house will free you up for bigger things! How great would that feel?

Get in touch with me NOW to get yourself started. You will be glad you did!

 

5 Ways To Achieve Your Goals As A Women

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Remember when you were little and had your dreams for when you were a grown up? I wanted to be an astronaut. Or a ballerina. As we grow up, those dreams evolve. My desire to be an astronaut or a ballerina fell by the wayside when I failed earth science and grew a foot. After college I knew I wanted to write and help people.

I didn ‘ t know how to do that, so I went into the hospitality business, retail sales and became a mom. Suddenly I was 40 and a working mom, and my dreams had disappeared under a load of laundry.

Now, 10 years later, I am living the life of my dreams. I write articles and blogs and coach moms towards reaching their dreams. I have learned a lot along the way and want to share this with you today.

5 Ways Women Must Take To Achieve Your Goals:

Women often have multiple responsibilities, from family and career to personal growth and development. It can be easy to lose sight of our goals amid all these competing demands. However, setting and achieving goals is essential to our well-being and success.

So Here are five ways to achieve your goals as a woman:

#1 – Be clear about what is important to you:

I can ‘ t say this enough. If you don ‘ t know what is essential to you, you can ‘ t prioritise it. Instead your life will consist of day after day doing the things you need to do to get by.

Do this. Mark out 1 hour on your calendar this week, one hour to still down with a cup of tea and write down everything essential to you. Write down the things that you do and things that you don ‘ t. Set it aside and go pick up the kids from school.

A few days later, revisit your list. Did you forget anything? Is there anything on there that maybe shouldn ‘ t be?

Next, circle the top 10 most essential things on your list. Then from that list, circle the top 7 most important things and the top 5 most important things. From your top 5 list, circle the top 3 most important things.

You now have the top 3 things that are most important to you. See, that wasn ‘ t so hard.

#2 – Have a plan in place to make those 3 things a priority:

Make sure that plan is one that you are excited about. Making this plan is most accessible when working with a life coach, but you can do it yourself.

If exercise is priority, build into your calendar a little bit of time three days a week to do so. Just a little bit. Maybe 15 minutes. Then, a few weeks later, build in a little more time. Slowly grow the time you exercise until you do it as much as you want. The key is making time for it and making it a priority.

#3 – Surround yourself with a supportive and loving community:

Your community can comprise family, friends, co-workers, and gym mates who can support you and hold you accountable. This is key to success. We all have good intentions, but it ‘ s hard to stay on the path to reaching our dreams without support and accountability.

#4 – Do NOT doubt yourself:

This is the most self-sabotaging thing that we do. We listen to the voice in our head that tells us that we can ‘ t do something. That we don ‘ t have the time or that we aren ‘ t good enough, or that we don ‘ t deserve something.

This is, may I say, complete bullshit. You are a fantastic person who gives and gives, and you should have the life of your dreams. And if you are happy, everyone around you will be happy!

#5 – Take care of yourself and try to have a little fun:

Yes our lives are crazy, but every mom must take a little time for herself. Take a bath, go for a walk, go shopping with a friend, climb a mountain, learn to surf, take a road trip. Do something every day that feeds your soul. Take a day a month to do something you want to do.

And at least once a year, get away to get to know yourself again.

So there you are ‘ ¦5 Ways To Achieve Your Goals As A Women , Even if There are Million Excuses not to ‘ ¦

Remember, it ‘ s never too late to live the life that you want. You need to take that first step and decide what that life is. The rest you can do, easy.

Just look at all that you do now. Only Superwoman can do what you do every day. Your dreams will be a cinch ‘ ¦ Get in touch with me NOW to get your started. You will be glad you did!

7 Reasons Donald Trump & Every Man Wishes He Held the Woman Card

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By now you have heard, I am sure, that according to Donald Trump the only reason that Hillary Clinton is being taken seriously is because she ‘ has the woman card. ‘ The interweb has, of course, gone nutty over this but what has surprised me is that women are shouting about all of the things that we women DON ‘ T have because we are holding the ‘ woman card, ‘ not all of the things that we DO have.

Here are 7 reasons why I believe that holding the woman card is a good thing, full of benefits that men just wish they had.

#1 – With the woman card we are powerful.

Say what you want but a man will do ANYTHING to win the woman he wants. ANYTHING. A man wanting a woman started the Trojan War, forced a king to abdicate his throne and has brought down more American politicians than I can count.

#2 – With the woman card we are capable of being pregnant and giving birth.

We propagate the species. Enough said.

#3 – With the woman card we can ask for directions and choose a parking space…

…freeing up innumerable hours in a lifetime to pursue other pleasures.

#4 – With the woman card are skilled in the art of faking ‘ it, ‘

…simultaneously making a man feel special and speeding up the process so that we can get some sleep. AND we can have multiple ‘ it ‘ without, um, recharging.

# 5 – With the woman card we can do many things that are deemed difficult or even impossible.

Like peeing standing up. Or giving birth without drugs. Or Thanksgiving dinner for 12.

#6 – With the woman card we can do many things at the same time.

We could even do #2-5 above without breaking a sweat and still have #1 be our reality.

# 7 – With the woman card we live longer.

We live longer. What man doesn ‘ t want that? The ultimate frequent ‘ woman card ‘ user reward ‘ ¦.

So. All you women out there. Remember. We rock. Don’t let anyone try to take your power or make you think less of yourself. Hold your head high, go for what you want and wield that woman card proudly.

5 Reasons to Love Your Mother-in-Law, Even When It’s Really Hard

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Are you desperately seeking reasons to love your mother-in-law? Does it seem hard some days? Do you want to know if your mother-in-law likes you?

When you get married, more likely than not, you also get a mother-in-law, the woman who raised your partner. And quickly, there can arise conflict between you. She raised your partner and is used to things being done a certain way, and you married him or her and have your own opinions and traditions. This conflict can be really hard on a marriage. It can even destroy it.

Don ‘ t fret!

By understanding more about how your mother-in-law ‘ s brain works, you can improve your relationship with her and alleviate conflict and thereby strengthen your relationship with your partner.

Reasons to Love Your Mother-in-Law

Here are top 5 best reasons to love your mother-in-law.

#1 – Remember that she has experience that you don ‘ t have.

Our mothers-in-law have been doing what you are just beginning to do for probably more than a few decades. That is a lot of experience, experience that you should appreciate and take advantage of. You are new at all of this and can use all the help you can get, whether you know it or not.

An excellent way to get closer to your mother-in-law is to ask her to share that experience with you. Asking her questions, getting her opinions, sometimes even deferring to her wishes will all help you connect with her. And if she feels like she is playing part of her child’s new life, she will be way easier to get along with.

So mine some of the experience that you have right at hand. You will be glad you did, for many reasons.

#2 – Remember that she did raise your partner.

I know it ‘ s hard to imagine your mother-in-law gave birth to your partner. She fed them and bathed them, and changed their diapers for years. She taught them how to do just about everything that they do.

Your mother-in-law profoundly influenced your partner ‘ s life for 18 years or more. And that shouldn ‘ t be discounted. She even deserves some credit and respect for the fact that she did that.

My mother-in-law always told me that her son could vacuum a toilet like a madman. I told her that I had retrained him after 20 years of marriage: he cleaned nothing anymore. I see now that that was a slap in her face. She worked hard to raise the person that she did and should be recognized, and appreciated for that.

And remember, you did fall in love with the person she raised ‘ ¦.

#3 – Remember that she loves your kids as much, if not more, than you do.

They say that being a grandparent is the most wonderful thing in the world. You get all the joys of being a parent without all the difficulties. So know that, at the very least, one more person is madly in love with your child.

I know that my grandmother was a huge positive influence in my life. She hadn ‘ t been a great mother to my mother, but, for me, she was amazing. And I have learned, from my mother, that having grandchildren is the best thing ever happening to her.

An older couple holding a baby and another elderly woman.

So appreciate that this person loves your children as much as she does. After all, every person who loves your child is a gift.

#4 – Remember that she does want to help.

Mothers in-law don ‘ t set out to drive us crazy. They don ‘ t mean to criticize our parenting or complain about the state of our kitchen. They are there, in the house, to be with their children and grandchildren.

And, more often than not, their intentions are good.

Perhaps how they speak up about our parenting or housekeeping skills is abrasive and stinging, but remember, they are only human and most likely just trying to help. Really.

So next time your mother-in-law is in your house, put her to work. She can hang out with the kids or help you fold the laundry or take your partner out for a break. Mothers are used to being busy, and when she is at your house, a ‘guest,’ she might feel put out and useless.

I am sure there is some help somewhere that you need.

#5 – Remember that you are lucky to have her and that she won ‘ t always be there.

So many mothers start with no support. Their mother and mother-in-law is far away, no longer alive, or absent.

We are lucky to have someone there who can support us when we are new or even more seasoned parents. My mother lived in Virginia, and while she was there right after my daughter was born, she could only stay a week.

Fortunately, my mother-in-law lived close by. And while we didn’t always see eye to eye, she was there some times when I needed her. I am very lucky that I had that.

Also, remember, none of us are getting any younger, so our mothers-in-law might not always be there for us. Appreciate how lucky you are and make the best of it.

To love your mother-in-law is not always easy, but I promise you that doing so will be worth it in the long run.

Learn from her experience, have respect for the years she cared for your spouse, know that she adores your kids, put her to work and appreciate that she exists.

After all, your partner loves her. She is his or her mother. Your loving her shows your partner how much you love them, which makes everybody happy.

5 Reasons: Why Do I Need A Life Coach?

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When we get married and have kids, no one gives us a manual on being an effective spouse or parent. As a result we are more often than not just winging it. We check websites, talk to our friends, and listen to our mothers, but we are just flying by the seat of our pants, trying to follow our instincts. And we do the best that we can.

Imagine someone walking by your side, whispering in your ear, encouraging and supporting you through those tough life decisions. A life coach can do that for you.

Why Do I Need A Life Coach?

In this article, I will explain the 5 reasons that why you need a life coach.

#1 – To feel less torn and more whole in a million different directions.

The key role that a life coach plays in the life of a mom is to help identify opportunities and make a plan. Many moms are so caught up in the day-to-day struggle of getting things done that they lose sight of the big picture. When working with me, instead of winging it, a mom is working a daily plan that helps her reach her goal as she defines it, a plan she has helped create, so she knows it will work for her.

One of my clients was completely overwhelmed by her life…managing her work at home and at the office, her kids, her volunteer work and her friends. We took a good hard look at what was important to her and what was not, and we planned to manage those things in a way that left her more satisfied, less torn, and happier.

#2 – To feel less exhausted and more energized.

Imagine going to bed each night and waking up each morning knowing how you will get through your day. You know how you will take care of yourself so that you can manage this crazy life of yours and not come undone. Imagine how energizing that will feel. You are no longer flying by the seat of your pants, which leaves you feeling completely drained. If you identify your opportunities, plan and work through them, this will happen.

Kris knew that she would have to get rid of her farm because the chore work was more than she could handle with the work around her family. She was devastated because her farm was the best part of her day. We looked at what it was about her farm that was so overwhelming, and she kept on coming back to her back pain ‘ ¦a pain made more intense by her farm work and made her less able to care for her family.

We made a plan for her to see her doctor and get PT, and within six months, she was able to farm AND take care of her family. She said that attending to that one thing, her back, was life changing for her.

#3 – To feel supported and heard.

You have many friends, a loving partner, siblings and co-workers who all make you feel supported and heard. But all of those people have lives of their own that they have to attend to, and they are more likely than not going to tell you what you want to hear. Not a life coach. I am here to provide you unconditional support when you need it most. And I will listen to you and empathize, but I will challenge you on your thinking to make sure that the choices you are making and the path you are choosing is the right path for you.

#4 – To improve your relationships.

Life as a mother is chaotic, jam-packed and exhausting. We are pulled in a million different ways, and, often as not, we are crabby as hell. We snap at our kids, sulk at our partners and ignore our mothers. All of these things do not improve our relationships. Working with a life coach will allow you to define your goals, give you a path to get there and ultimately give you the life of your dreams. And when you are happy, your children will thrive, your relationship will flourish and your career will soar. Everybody wins!

#5 – To hold you accountable and help you celebrate.

The best thing about a life coach is that I will hold you accountable in reaching your dreams. I will be there, by your side, supporting you step by step and if, for some reason, you falter, I will pick you up by your bootstraps and get you back on the path. And then, when you reach the life of your dreams, I will be there to help you celebrate because I will know, more than anyone, how hard you have worked to achieve it. Imagine how good that will feel reaching your dreams.

I know it’s hard to believe that you deserve one, but remember this: if a woman is living the life of her dreams, her relationship will be happier, her children better adjusted, her friendships stronger and her work more successful.

Have you had experience working with a life coach? If so, did it work for you?

If you’re a woman and you are thinking about working with a life coach, please contact me for a free 45-minute phone session!

5 Little Ways for Moms to Feel Happier

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Every day moms take care of everyone else. That is just what we do. We make sure the kids are loved, fed, bathed and supported. Likewise, our partners. We do our best to carry our share, or more, at work and always try to be a shoulder to cry on for our friends.

What we aren ‘ t good at is taking care of ourselves. We set goals to go to the gym, or sleep more or eat better but in the end life gets in the way, and we just let it go.

We don’t have to do this!

Little Ways For Moms To Feel Happier:

Here are 5 Little Ways for Moms to Feel Happier.

#1 – Every day, do one thing that makes you happy:

It doesn ‘ t need to be a big thing but do something. Make a playlist for your car and listen to music that makes you sing out loud. Serve breakfast for dinner (because no one ever complains when dinner involves pancakes). Bring your book in the car and read a chapter while waiting to pick up the kids at school. Whatever small thing it is that makes your heart sing.

For me, when my kids were little, every Sunday was pizza night, and then my People magazine and I would retire to the bathtub for an hour. I went to bed Sunday night happy, and Monday mornings were much easier.

#2 – Replace the Oreos:

I am willing to bet that Oreos were not a staple of your diet before you had kids. Am I wrong? But now they are because they are in the cupboard. You get tired, or stressed or bored, and there, right in front of you, is a little disk of self-indulgence. So you eat one or 20, feel better for 30 seconds, and then feel not so good.

Keep something you love in the cupboard that will fill that need when you get tired, stressed, or bored, and go for that instead. Chocolate-covered almonds, honey-roasted peanuts, or individually wrapped chocolates (so you can ‘ t take a handful). And, if you have something that combines sugar and protein (like sweetened nuts), you won ‘ t be affected by the sugar so quickly and won ‘ t get that Oreo cookie crash.

#3 – Play with your kids:

When our kids are born, we all have grand plans to get down on the floor with them and play. And we do, at least until their sibling is born, and then we as often as not let them have at it.

Playing with your kids makes you happier, and happiness leads to healthiness. First of all, play makes you smile, and the physical act of smiling makes you happy. Also, by sheer definition, play is more fun than work. So put on a tiara and frolic with your kids, at least briefly. Try it!

One of my clients plays a game of cards with her kids and her husband every night after dinner. It only takes 20 minutes and they laugh and kid and enjoy each others company. And then off they go to homework etc. She reports that the 20 minutes makes the transitions easier and sets up a much smoother bedtime routine, every mother ‘ s dream.

#4 – Get just a little more sleep:

I know you are saying, ‘ Yeah. Right. ‘ But I am serious. Try to fit just a little more sleep into your day. Actually I am suggesting you build it into your schedule. Right there, between going to the dry cleaners and finishing your project for the meeting. Make a plan to take a 15-minute nap right after lunch, before you head out to do errands. Or sleep 15 minutes later 3 times a week, wherever you can fit in just a little more sleep.

If you sleep in 15 minutes 3 days a week, that ‘ s 45 minutes more sleep. Add two naps in there, and you have more than an hour. Every bit of sleep makes a difference.

#5 – Do one thing that will get your heart rate up:

Can ‘ t make time for the gym? No problem. Even a little cardio is better than none. Why? Because getting your heart rate up produces more endorphins, and endorphins produce a euphoric feeling.

Ideas? Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Dance around the kitchen while cooking a meal. Walk the dog. Ride a bike. Kick a soccer ball. Jump on the trampoline. Getting your heart rate up regularly is a very healthy thing to do.

A woman running in the middle of a field.

I have a client whose family got a dog. My client was worried because she knew it would do more work for her, which it did. Of course it needed to be walked, but taking it for walks changed her life. Not only did getting out of the house and getting her heartbeat up make her feel good, she also made more friends when she was out with the dog, and we know what more friends can do for your health!

So there you go: 5 Little Ways for Moms to Feel Happier. Give them a try for week. See what a difference it makes. Let me know when it does!

Have I missed anything? Do you have something you do that makes you feel healthier daily?

Are you having trouble implementing healthy habits into your life? Do you feel guilty when you try to set aside time to make yourself feel healthier? Let’s talk.

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