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5 Ways To Achieve Your Goals As A Women

May 5, 2016/1 Comment/by Mitzi Bockmann


Remember when you were little and had your dreams for when you were a grown up? I wanted to be an astronaut. Or a ballerina. As we grow up, those dreams evolve. My desire to be an astronaut or a ballerina fell by the wayside when I failed earth science and grew a foot. After college I knew I wanted to write and help people.

I didn ‘ t know how to do that, so I went into the hospitality business, retail sales and became a mom. Suddenly I was 40 and a working mom, and my dreams had disappeared under a load of laundry.

Now, 10 years later, I am living the life of my dreams. I write articles and blogs and coach moms towards reaching their dreams. I have learned a lot along the way and want to share this with you today.

5 Ways Women Must Take To Achieve Your Goals:

Women often have multiple responsibilities, from family and career to personal growth and development. It can be easy to lose sight of our goals amid all these competing demands. However, setting and achieving goals is essential to our well-being and success.

So Here are five ways to achieve your goals as a woman:

#1 – Be clear about what is important to you:

I can ‘ t say this enough. If you don ‘ t know what is essential to you, you can ‘ t prioritise it. Instead your life will consist of day after day doing the things you need to do to get by.

Do this. Mark out 1 hour on your calendar this week, one hour to still down with a cup of tea and write down everything essential to you. Write down the things that you do and things that you don ‘ t. Set it aside and go pick up the kids from school.

A few days later, revisit your list. Did you forget anything? Is there anything on there that maybe shouldn ‘ t be?

Next, circle the top 10 most essential things on your list. Then from that list, circle the top 7 most important things and the top 5 most important things. From your top 5 list, circle the top 3 most important things.

You now have the top 3 things that are most important to you. See, that wasn ‘ t so hard.

#2 – Have a plan in place to make those 3 things a priority:

Make sure that plan is one that you are excited about. Making this plan is most accessible when working with a life coach, but you can do it yourself.

If exercise is priority, build into your calendar a little bit of time three days a week to do so. Just a little bit. Maybe 15 minutes. Then, a few weeks later, build in a little more time. Slowly grow the time you exercise until you do it as much as you want. The key is making time for it and making it a priority.

#3 – Surround yourself with a supportive and loving community:

Your community can comprise family, friends, co-workers, and gym mates who can support you and hold you accountable. This is key to success. We all have good intentions, but it ‘ s hard to stay on the path to reaching our dreams without support and accountability.

#4 – Do NOT doubt yourself:

This is the most self-sabotaging thing that we do. We listen to the voice in our head that tells us that we can ‘ t do something. That we don ‘ t have the time or that we aren ‘ t good enough, or that we don ‘ t deserve something.

This is, may I say, complete bullshit. You are a fantastic person who gives and gives, and you should have the life of your dreams. And if you are happy, everyone around you will be happy!

#5 – Take care of yourself and try to have a little fun:

Yes our lives are crazy, but every mom must take a little time for herself. Take a bath, go for a walk, go shopping with a friend, climb a mountain, learn to surf, take a road trip. Do something every day that feeds your soul. Take a day a month to do something you want to do.

And at least once a year, get away to get to know yourself again.

So there you are ‘ ¦5 Ways To Achieve Your Goals As A Women , Even if There are Million Excuses not to ‘ ¦

Remember, it ‘ s never too late to live the life that you want. You need to take that first step and decide what that life is. The rest you can do, easy.

Just look at all that you do now. Only Superwoman can do what you do every day. Your dreams will be a cinch ‘ ¦ Get in touch with me NOW to get your started. You will be glad you did!

Mitzi Bockmann
Mitzi Bockmann

I am a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. My writing has been published on The Huffington Post, Prevention,  Psych Central, Pop Sugar, MSN and The Good Man Project, among others. I work with all kinds of people to help them go from depressed and overwhelmed to confident and happy in their relationships and in their world.

7 Reasons Donald Trump & Every Man Wishes He Held the Woman Card

April 29, 2016/2 Comments/by Mitzi Bockmann


By now you have heard, I am sure, that according to Donald Trump the only reason that Hillary Clinton is being taken seriously is because she ‘ has the woman card. ‘ The interweb has, of course, gone nutty over this but what has surprised me is that women are shouting about all of the things that we women DON ‘ T have because we are holding the ‘ woman card, ‘ not all of the things that we DO have.

Here are 7 reasons why I believe that holding the woman card is a good thing, full of benefits that men just wish they had.

#1 – With the woman card we are powerful.

Say what you want but a man will do ANYTHING to win the woman he wants. ANYTHING. A man wanting a woman started the Trojan War, forced a king to abdicate his throne and has brought down more American politicians than I can count.

#2 – With the woman card we are capable of being pregnant and giving birth.

We propagate the species. Enough said.

#3 – With the woman card we can ask for directions and choose a parking space…

…freeing up innumerable hours in a lifetime to pursue other pleasures.

#4 – With the woman card are skilled in the art of faking ‘ it, ‘

…simultaneously making a man feel special and speeding up the process so that we can get some sleep. AND we can have multiple ‘ it ‘ without, um, recharging.

# 5 – With the woman card we can do many things that are deemed difficult or even impossible.

Like peeing standing up. Or giving birth without drugs. Or Thanksgiving dinner for 12.

#6 – With the woman card we can do many things at the same time.

We could even do #2-5 above without breaking a sweat and still have #1 be our reality.

# 7 – With the woman card we live longer.

We live longer. What man doesn ‘ t want that? The ultimate frequent ‘ woman card ‘ user reward ‘ ¦.

So. All you women out there. Remember. We rock. Don’t let anyone try to take your power or make you think less of yourself. Hold your head high, go for what you want and wield that woman card proudly.

Mitzi Bockmann
Mitzi Bockmann

I am a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. My writing has been published on The Huffington Post, Prevention,  Psych Central, Pop Sugar, MSN and The Good Man Project, among others. I work with all kinds of people to help them go from depressed and overwhelmed to confident and happy in their relationships and in their world.

5 Reasons to Love Your Mother-in-Law, Even When It’s Really Hard

March 31, 2016/3 Comments/by Mitzi Bockmann


Are you desperately seeking reasons to love your mother-in-law? Does it seem hard some days? Do you want to know if your mother-in-law likes you?

When you get married, more likely than not, you also get a mother-in-law, the woman who raised your partner. And quickly, there can arise conflict between you. She raised your partner and is used to things being done a certain way, and you married him or her and have your own opinions and traditions. This conflict can be really hard on a marriage. It can even destroy it.

Don ‘ t fret!

By understanding more about how your mother-in-law ‘ s brain works, you can improve your relationship with her and alleviate conflict and thereby strengthen your relationship with your partner.

Reasons to Love Your Mother-in-Law

Here are top 5 best reasons to love your mother-in-law.

#1 – Remember that she has experience that you don ‘ t have.

Our mothers-in-law have been doing what you are just beginning to do for probably more than a few decades. That is a lot of experience, experience that you should appreciate and take advantage of. You are new at all of this and can use all the help you can get, whether you know it or not.

An excellent way to get closer to your mother-in-law is to ask her to share that experience with you. Asking her questions, getting her opinions, sometimes even deferring to her wishes will all help you connect with her. And if she feels like she is playing part of her child’s new life, she will be way easier to get along with.

So mine some of the experience that you have right at hand. You will be glad you did, for many reasons.

#2 – Remember that she did raise your partner.

I know it ‘ s hard to imagine your mother-in-law gave birth to your partner. She fed them and bathed them, and changed their diapers for years. She taught them how to do just about everything that they do.

Your mother-in-law profoundly influenced your partner ‘ s life for 18 years or more. And that shouldn ‘ t be discounted. She even deserves some credit and respect for the fact that she did that.

My mother-in-law always told me that her son could vacuum a toilet like a madman. I told her that I had retrained him after 20 years of marriage: he cleaned nothing anymore. I see now that that was a slap in her face. She worked hard to raise the person that she did and should be recognized, and appreciated for that.

And remember, you did fall in love with the person she raised ‘ ¦.

#3 – Remember that she loves your kids as much, if not more, than you do.

They say that being a grandparent is the most wonderful thing in the world. You get all the joys of being a parent without all the difficulties. So know that, at the very least, one more person is madly in love with your child.

I know that my grandmother was a huge positive influence in my life. She hadn ‘ t been a great mother to my mother, but, for me, she was amazing. And I have learned, from my mother, that having grandchildren is the best thing ever happening to her.

An older couple holding a baby and another elderly woman.

So appreciate that this person loves your children as much as she does. After all, every person who loves your child is a gift.

#4 – Remember that she does want to help.

Mothers in-law don ‘ t set out to drive us crazy. They don ‘ t mean to criticize our parenting or complain about the state of our kitchen. They are there, in the house, to be with their children and grandchildren.

And, more often than not, their intentions are good.

Perhaps how they speak up about our parenting or housekeeping skills is abrasive and stinging, but remember, they are only human and most likely just trying to help. Really.

So next time your mother-in-law is in your house, put her to work. She can hang out with the kids or help you fold the laundry or take your partner out for a break. Mothers are used to being busy, and when she is at your house, a ‘guest,’ she might feel put out and useless.

I am sure there is some help somewhere that you need.

#5 – Remember that you are lucky to have her and that she won ‘ t always be there.

So many mothers start with no support. Their mother and mother-in-law is far away, no longer alive, or absent.

We are lucky to have someone there who can support us when we are new or even more seasoned parents. My mother lived in Virginia, and while she was there right after my daughter was born, she could only stay a week.

Fortunately, my mother-in-law lived close by. And while we didn’t always see eye to eye, she was there some times when I needed her. I am very lucky that I had that.

Also, remember, none of us are getting any younger, so our mothers-in-law might not always be there for us. Appreciate how lucky you are and make the best of it.

To love your mother-in-law is not always easy, but I promise you that doing so will be worth it in the long run.

Learn from her experience, have respect for the years she cared for your spouse, know that she adores your kids, put her to work and appreciate that she exists.

After all, your partner loves her. She is his or her mother. Your loving her shows your partner how much you love them, which makes everybody happy.

Mitzi Bockmann
Mitzi Bockmann

I am a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. My writing has been published on The Huffington Post, Prevention,  Psych Central, Pop Sugar, MSN and The Good Man Project, among others. I work with all kinds of people to help them go from depressed and overwhelmed to confident and happy in their relationships and in their world.

5 Reasons: Why Do I Need A Life Coach?

March 24, 2016/by Mitzi Bockmann


When we get married and have kids, no one gives us a manual on being an effective spouse or parent. As a result we are more often than not just winging it. We check websites, talk to our friends, and listen to our mothers, but we are just flying by the seat of our pants, trying to follow our instincts. And we do the best that we can.

Imagine someone walking by your side, whispering in your ear, encouraging and supporting you through those tough life decisions. A life coach can do that for you.

Why Do I Need A Life Coach?

In this article, I will explain the 5 reasons that why you need a life coach.

#1 – To feel less torn and more whole in a million different directions.

The key role that a life coach plays in the life of a mom is to help identify opportunities and make a plan. Many moms are so caught up in the day-to-day struggle of getting things done that they lose sight of the big picture. When working with me, instead of winging it, a mom is working a daily plan that helps her reach her goal as she defines it, a plan she has helped create, so she knows it will work for her.

One of my clients was completely overwhelmed by her life…managing her work at home and at the office, her kids, her volunteer work and her friends. We took a good hard look at what was important to her and what was not, and we planned to manage those things in a way that left her more satisfied, less torn, and happier.

#2 – To feel less exhausted and more energized.

Imagine going to bed each night and waking up each morning knowing how you will get through your day. You know how you will take care of yourself so that you can manage this crazy life of yours and not come undone. Imagine how energizing that will feel. You are no longer flying by the seat of your pants, which leaves you feeling completely drained. If you identify your opportunities, plan and work through them, this will happen.

Kris knew that she would have to get rid of her farm because the chore work was more than she could handle with the work around her family. She was devastated because her farm was the best part of her day. We looked at what it was about her farm that was so overwhelming, and she kept on coming back to her back pain ‘ ¦a pain made more intense by her farm work and made her less able to care for her family.

We made a plan for her to see her doctor and get PT, and within six months, she was able to farm AND take care of her family. She said that attending to that one thing, her back, was life changing for her.

#3 – To feel supported and heard.

You have many friends, a loving partner, siblings and co-workers who all make you feel supported and heard. But all of those people have lives of their own that they have to attend to, and they are more likely than not going to tell you what you want to hear. Not a life coach. I am here to provide you unconditional support when you need it most. And I will listen to you and empathize, but I will challenge you on your thinking to make sure that the choices you are making and the path you are choosing is the right path for you.

#4 – To improve your relationships.

Life as a mother is chaotic, jam-packed and exhausting. We are pulled in a million different ways, and, often as not, we are crabby as hell. We snap at our kids, sulk at our partners and ignore our mothers. All of these things do not improve our relationships. Working with a life coach will allow you to define your goals, give you a path to get there and ultimately give you the life of your dreams. And when you are happy, your children will thrive, your relationship will flourish and your career will soar. Everybody wins!

#5 – To hold you accountable and help you celebrate.

The best thing about a life coach is that I will hold you accountable in reaching your dreams. I will be there, by your side, supporting you step by step and if, for some reason, you falter, I will pick you up by your bootstraps and get you back on the path. And then, when you reach the life of your dreams, I will be there to help you celebrate because I will know, more than anyone, how hard you have worked to achieve it. Imagine how good that will feel reaching your dreams.

I know it’s hard to believe that you deserve one, but remember this: if a woman is living the life of her dreams, her relationship will be happier, her children better adjusted, her friendships stronger and her work more successful.

Have you had experience working with a life coach? If so, did it work for you?

If you’re a woman and you are thinking about working with a life coach, please contact me for a free 45-minute phone session!

Mitzi Bockmann
Mitzi Bockmann

I am a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. My writing has been published on The Huffington Post, Prevention,  Psych Central, Pop Sugar, MSN and The Good Man Project, among others. I work with all kinds of people to help them go from depressed and overwhelmed to confident and happy in their relationships and in their world.

5 Little Ways for Moms to Feel Happier

March 17, 2016/2 Comments/by Mitzi Bockmann


Every day moms take care of everyone else. That is just what we do. We make sure the kids are loved, fed, bathed and supported. Likewise, our partners. We do our best to carry our share, or more, at work and always try to be a shoulder to cry on for our friends.

What we aren ‘ t good at is taking care of ourselves. We set goals to go to the gym, or sleep more or eat better but in the end life gets in the way, and we just let it go.

We don’t have to do this!

Little Ways For Moms To Feel Happier:

Here are 5 Little Ways for Moms to Feel Happier.

#1 – Every day, do one thing that makes you happy:

It doesn ‘ t need to be a big thing but do something. Make a playlist for your car and listen to music that makes you sing out loud. Serve breakfast for dinner (because no one ever complains when dinner involves pancakes). Bring your book in the car and read a chapter while waiting to pick up the kids at school. Whatever small thing it is that makes your heart sing.

For me, when my kids were little, every Sunday was pizza night, and then my People magazine and I would retire to the bathtub for an hour. I went to bed Sunday night happy, and Monday mornings were much easier.

#2 – Replace the Oreos:

I am willing to bet that Oreos were not a staple of your diet before you had kids. Am I wrong? But now they are because they are in the cupboard. You get tired, or stressed or bored, and there, right in front of you, is a little disk of self-indulgence. So you eat one or 20, feel better for 30 seconds, and then feel not so good.

Keep something you love in the cupboard that will fill that need when you get tired, stressed, or bored, and go for that instead. Chocolate-covered almonds, honey-roasted peanuts, or individually wrapped chocolates (so you can ‘ t take a handful). And, if you have something that combines sugar and protein (like sweetened nuts), you won ‘ t be affected by the sugar so quickly and won ‘ t get that Oreo cookie crash.

#3 – Play with your kids:

When our kids are born, we all have grand plans to get down on the floor with them and play. And we do, at least until their sibling is born, and then we as often as not let them have at it.

Playing with your kids makes you happier, and happiness leads to healthiness. First of all, play makes you smile, and the physical act of smiling makes you happy. Also, by sheer definition, play is more fun than work. So put on a tiara and frolic with your kids, at least briefly. Try it!

One of my clients plays a game of cards with her kids and her husband every night after dinner. It only takes 20 minutes and they laugh and kid and enjoy each others company. And then off they go to homework etc. She reports that the 20 minutes makes the transitions easier and sets up a much smoother bedtime routine, every mother ‘ s dream.

#4 – Get just a little more sleep:

I know you are saying, ‘ Yeah. Right. ‘ But I am serious. Try to fit just a little more sleep into your day. Actually I am suggesting you build it into your schedule. Right there, between going to the dry cleaners and finishing your project for the meeting. Make a plan to take a 15-minute nap right after lunch, before you head out to do errands. Or sleep 15 minutes later 3 times a week, wherever you can fit in just a little more sleep.

If you sleep in 15 minutes 3 days a week, that ‘ s 45 minutes more sleep. Add two naps in there, and you have more than an hour. Every bit of sleep makes a difference.

#5 – Do one thing that will get your heart rate up:

Can ‘ t make time for the gym? No problem. Even a little cardio is better than none. Why? Because getting your heart rate up produces more endorphins, and endorphins produce a euphoric feeling.

Ideas? Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Dance around the kitchen while cooking a meal. Walk the dog. Ride a bike. Kick a soccer ball. Jump on the trampoline. Getting your heart rate up regularly is a very healthy thing to do.

A woman running in the middle of a field.

I have a client whose family got a dog. My client was worried because she knew it would do more work for her, which it did. Of course it needed to be walked, but taking it for walks changed her life. Not only did getting out of the house and getting her heartbeat up make her feel good, she also made more friends when she was out with the dog, and we know what more friends can do for your health!

So there you go: 5 Little Ways for Moms to Feel Happier. Give them a try for week. See what a difference it makes. Let me know when it does!

Have I missed anything? Do you have something you do that makes you feel healthier daily?

Are you having trouble implementing healthy habits into your life? Do you feel guilty when you try to set aside time to make yourself feel healthier? Let’s talk.

Mitzi Bockmann
Mitzi Bockmann

I am a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. My writing has been published on The Huffington Post, Prevention,  Psych Central, Pop Sugar, MSN and The Good Man Project, among others. I work with all kinds of people to help them go from depressed and overwhelmed to confident and happy in their relationships and in their world.

5 Ways To Be More Productive In Life & Work

March 9, 2016/4 Comments/by Mitzi Bockmann


So there aren ‘ t enough hours in the day, are there? There are school lunches to be made, buses to be caught, meetings to attend, dogs to be walked, homework to be done, mothers to be called, and TV shows to catch up on. The list is endless and impossible to manage.

Or is it?

Believe it or not there are ways to get on top of your to-do list.

5 Ways To Be More Prodcutive:

Here are 5 best ways to be more productive in life and work.

#1 – Use a notebook.

A spiral bound notebook. A notebook that makes you happy to look at and that you don ‘ t want to lose. This is the key to being productive. Every organized person you know has one.

It is in this notebook that you keep your to-do list. When something new comes up, you add it to your list. The to-do list in your notebook.

You do not keep your to-do list on paper that gets lost between the car seats or eaten by the dog. Your to-do list is in a notebook you can ‘ t throw away and refuse to lose track of.

#2 – Set priorities.

Every morning take 10 minutes to review your to-do list and to set priorities. You can do this by starring or highlighting the things on your list that you need to get done that day.

Many of us do first the things on our list that we don ‘ t mind doing and don ‘ t do what needs to be done.

Jill HATED making phones calls to set up appointments. As a result she never did set up appointments, so her dishwasher didn ‘ t get fixed, her son missed his doctor ‘ s appointment, and her daughter ‘ s permission slip didn ‘ t get signed. Once she started setting her priorities Jill 1) didn ‘ t have to make all of her phones calls at the same time but made them when they needed to be made (which made them less daunting) and 2) things that usually fell through the cracks (and did more work for her) no longer fell through the cracks.

#3 – Say No!

This is key. It is very, very hard for us to say no. We don ‘ t want to say no for various reasons, whether it ‘ s because we want to do something or we feel like we should do something or we think we need to do something. But before you say yes, look at why you are saying yes.

Janet always said yes, no matter what was asked of her. She liked to keep busy and didn ‘ t want to let anyone down. But of course she ended up letting everyone down because she couldn ‘ t be as effective at her tasks as she might have been. Once she started looking at why she was saying yes, and why she wasn ‘ t saying no, she could pick and choose what she said yes to. Once she did that, she managed her time more effectively and successfully completed each task.

#4 – If it takes less than 10 minutes, DO IT.

Next time you have a few minutes, while waiting for the bus to arrive, or for a phone call to come in or while the kids are watching TV, look at your list. Is there anything on it that you can get done in 10 minutes or less? If there is, DO IT! It ‘ s those little things that are daunting and tend to add up.

And let me tell you, from personal experience, there is nothing more mood-enhancing then crossing something off your list.

#5 – Check your computer only 3 times a day.

Yes, I know. This is the hard one. We are all addicted to our screens. Totally. And I am sure you are familiar with the phenomenon known as ‘ screen sucking. ‘ This is when your computer/phone/tablet screen sucks up your time before you know it. A great way to add time to your day is to stay away from your screen.

I have a client who used to check her phone every moment she got at the expense of everyone and everything around her. She checked it three times a day for one week at my suggestion: once in the morning, once at mid-day and once after dinner. It was painful in the beginning, she reported, but by the end of the week the amount of time she had to be productive had dramatically increased. So try it for one week. See what happens.

There are 24 hours in our day, and everyone should sleep for 8. That leaves you 16 hours a day to use wisely. If you do, your life will be simpler, you will be happier, and those around you will thrive.

Remember- work smarter, not harder. If you feel constantly overwhelmed with your daily tasks to the point where your life is not joyful, let’s talk.

Mitzi Bockmann
Mitzi Bockmann

I am a NYC based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate. My writing has been published on The Huffington Post, Prevention,  Psych Central, Pop Sugar, MSN and The Good Man Project, among others. I work with all kinds of people to help them go from depressed and overwhelmed to confident and happy in their relationships and in their world.

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I'm here to help

I am a New York City-based Certified Life Coach with 10 years experience as a working life coach. I am certified through the Coach Training Alliance and I am a member of the International Coach Federation.

Over the years I have worked with hundreds of people, like you, to help make serious change in their lives. These people have succeeded at, among other things, restoring the love in their relationships, getting to know themselves again and finding their place in the world.

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